Welcome to my Moonbox: a gathering of musings, learnings, and aspirations held (perhaps, sometimes only briefly) by the many expressions of me, Sarita.
From the desk:
4/14/24
Sunbeam through the trees
against the red-auburn slats of the house
in it, the shadow of a crow
waddling westerward,
just a brief roll of sun
as if peering into a creek and seeing
the whole forest move.
3/14/24
Something in the throat of night
the way lights orange or redden
the shape of wonder
an endlessness, much akin to thrill
at the thought of being
different behind the wheel
in the dark
with the road flow
and blurring edge
a curious cusp
a hiding, or, throe
of, into, another path
another young waking
of, into, another thought
another chance to edge
the self with wonder
emerge from the throat
as a reddening dawn.
Life updates: I have no real excuse for why I didn’t publish a Moonbox Notes in April. It was pure laziness, perhaps influenced by the onset of depression set off by my running injury. Yup. In mid-March, I awoke, stood up out of bed, and immediately felt sharp pain in the 5th metatarsal of my left foot (where I’d previously had a stress fracture in 2016). After two days of sharp pain, it was obvious the stress fracture had returned.
It’s been eight long weeks of recovery thus far, and I still have an unknown journey ahead. To have this happen now, the year I become sponsored, right before three back-to-back races, one being my first international race (a Skyrunning race! a world stage!)…obviously, injuries are never convenient. I was angry, I was embarrassed, I was heartbroken. While my teammates set course records, new FKTs, place high within prestigious fields of competitors, or are simply training to their heart’s content, I have been spending a lot of time on the couch.
Thankfully, I’m able to sprinkle in bike spinning, the stair master, and strength training. Recently, I added some aqua walking and real-world cycling. Every week is its own mini-saga of walking gingerly around the house, attempting to wear various shoes to see if my foot can handle it, wearing down the surgeon shoe I’ve been using to recover in (the heel foam is compressing around the metal shank and now my heel rests on that…). I bought a short walking boot for longer ventures, but it doesn’t really help me walk with good form, and so I don’t really use it as much as I thought I would.
I’ve gained weight. I feel self-conscious. I don’t like people seeing me like this. My mental health plummeted in those early weeks. I overslept often. Early on, I didn’t even want to see friends. And that first menstrual period during this injury time, yikes! My PMS was so intense, something I hadn’t experienced since I was a teenager. It has become so obvious to me how my running has helped regulate my hormones all these years. How energetic it makes me day-to-day. How positive and less prone to depression.
In the past week, I’ve finally had running dreams. I’m not sure why it took so long for them to appear. But I love them because in them my body gets to feel what it is to run again. I’ve had three people do various assessments to determine my readiness for running, and I passed all of them. But that doesn’t mean I don’t experience pain anymore, which keeps me nervous. After my last assessment, I went to the rec center very hopeful to try a walk/run workout. Though, since I hadn’t done any higher heart rate work in several days, I opted for a stair master interval workout instead. After the workout, I began some strength training and tried the leg press machine, which my foot kind of didn’t like. I think with the culmination of everything (even a weekend of hiking more) my injury was starting to feel sore. Out of curiosity, I started walking on the treadmill to see if it felt ready to try the walk/run workout, but my soreness increased, so I stopped and called it a day. It’s just frustrating all around to feel so close and yet so far.
La Vida Mundial:
REI | REI celebrates new public lands rule elevating conservation and recreation | Apr 18, 2024
Outdoor Industry | New EPA reporting rule to require 12 years of PFAS data from manufacturers and importers | Jan 16, 2024
MSNBC | Not Forgotten: Missing and Murdered Indigenous Womens’ Day of Remembrance | May 5, 2024
AP News | Hamas accepts cease-fire proposal for Gaza, but Israel’s stance still uncertain | May 6, 2024
Explorersweb | Climate Change is Slowing Down Time | Apr 3, 2024
HBD to all April/May birthdays!
[Previous: Moonbox Notes #22]
Recent Top Pick Reads:
+ “Capitalism Stole Earth Day. Let’s Take It Back.” by Kristin Hostetter, Outside Online, Environment, Apr 17, 2024. A great article that reminds us of the origins of Earth Day, as a protest, and showcases points of view from various environmentalists regarding what Earth Day should or does mean.
+ “The 4 R’s of Running the Earth,” by Vic Thasiah, RUN, Outside Online, Apr 22, 2024. The founder of Runners for Public Lands (RPL) discusses reciprocity, responsibility, and community amid the vastness of Tüpippüh, or, Death Valley National Park.
+ “In the Absence of Hugs,” by Rachel Furey, Short Reads, May 8, 2024. A short, beautiful piece about the subtle physicality of loneliness during the pandemic and how brief bursts of touch mean everything.
+ “Running and a Sense of Place,” by Andy Jones-Wilkins, iRunFar, March 29, 2024. A short, interesting piece about quotes from Wallace Stegner’s essay and how Jones-Wilkins implements these sentiments into his own sense of place and being.
Books/Mags in progress:
+ Trace by Lauret Savoy
+ Sound Like Trapped Thunder by Jessica Lind Peterson
Recent Listens/Watchings:
+ “The American Dream is a pyramid scheme,” The Gray Area with Sean Illing Podcast, Vox Media, Apr 1, 2024. Illing and guest Jane Marie discuss Multi Level Marketing scams and how if you zoom out enough, these practices are seen within all levels of our economy.
+ “The Active Voice: Suleika Jaouad and Yung Pueblo are creating to live,” The Active Voice Podcast, Substack, May 23, 2023. Jaouad and Diego Perez (Yung Pueblo) discuss how they came to writing through adversity, and how writing as a way to live has become more than just a craft.
+ “Barbara Durham, Timbisha Shoshone elder,” by Kim Stringfellow, The Mojave Project, Soundcloud, 2016. Durham talks about how the Timbisha Shoshone Tribe fought for ancestral lands in Death Valley National Park and what it means to have this land.
+ “Plunge Into a Black Hole in NASA’s State-of-the-Art Simulation,” by Sam Anderson, Explorersweb, NASA Space, May 10, 2024. A really neat video of what it could be like to plunge into a black hole — very trippy!
Writing/Projects: (updates are highlighted)
+I currently have two general submissions in the ether: a short nonfiction piece entitled, “El Viento” (The Sun Mag) and a short nonfiction piece entitled, “A Searing Thing” (Hippocampus Mag).
+I submitted my previously published essay, “Sounds of Me, Sounds of Light,” to an essay contest (where this is allowed). Winner/runner-ups will be announced in October.
+The hybrid essay/memoir I wrote in 2021, “Chuckwalla,” still needs some major revision and writing. I have also submitted this project to the 2024 Graywolf Press work-in-progress prize.
+I have a Science Fiction novella that I’ve been slowly working on since 2017.
Athlete Life
- Race Schedule:
- May 24-26 – Mexico Sky Challenge 35K, Orizaba, Veracruz (Because of my injury I will no longer be able to race, but will still go to volunteer and support teammates/friends)
- Jun 6-9 – GoPro Games Apres 5K, 10K, & Pepi’s Faceoff, Vail, CO (Because of my injury I am unsure what I will actually be able to race here)
- Jun 20-24 – Broken Arrow Skyrace 23K, Olympic Valley, CA ((Because of my injury I am unsure what I will actually be able to race here)
- Aug 3 – Kennebec Mountain Run 15 Miler, Durango, CO
- Main FKTs on the list for 2024:
- Durango 7 Summits, CO
- Evo Loop via Lamarck Col or Standard Loop, CA
- Lowest to Highest (Badwater to Tumanguya/Mt. Whitney), CA
MISC/Brags/Swag:
- Nothing to brag about right now…maybe the fact that I’m not as depressed as I was in early April…
- Don’t forget that you can receive 20% OFF at Merrell by using SARA20 at checkout!
- I’ve recently partnered with GoSleeves, maker of compression garments utilizing kinesiology tape for targeted support. Check them out here and get 15% off (or use “heysara” at checkout).
Thanks for tuning in to Sarita’s Moonbox.
Happy Spring!
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